Friday, May 22, 2009

Nobody Said It Was Going To Be Easy!

One more challenge I have to go through. I have to put off Radiation for another week! My skin is not taking it real well. I started an antibiotic to fight any infection from the blisters that have occurred. The only good thing out of this is that my plastic surgeon took out 75ccs of Saline from the expander so I am feeling so much better. I truly lived with constant pain from my back to my chest with the amount of fluid that pressed into my chest wall! So for now I'm feeling good. I will probably sleep well for the 1st time in months without any discomfort. So again I have to say... I have to just keep going! I have no choice!

Friday, May 15, 2009

Taking a BREAK!

Not the break I wanted to take but today I was told by my Radiologist that radiation was burring a hole in the breast tissue and I needed to give my skin a break! I had no idea this could happen. I noticed today that I looked real red but thought that was normal. I guess my skin just can't take it! I'm so sad I have to extend this treatment now for another week which puts me in the middle of June but it is better to stop-rest my skin and heal!

I asked myself today.... So what would you rather have? Burned, itchy skin.... or being sick and out of it? I decided to choose having the burned skin... I can handle it much more!

So next week I will rest from the radiation visit my plastic surgeon to see if the burned skin is effecting the tissue expander and enjoy the break! I'm just getting use to these set backs because nothing surprises me anymore! I will post my plastic surgeons opinion soon. Wish me luck!

Sunday, May 10, 2009

The Results of Radiation is starting to show!

I thought I would breeze by with Radiation but now that 3 weeks have passed I'm begining to see what it does to your skin! My chest where the expander is to strech the tissue for a new breast looks like I've been sunburned... It iches and is very sore to the touch...This is expected according to my doctor. Its normal for some people to have these reactions.

Going everyday gets real old but I need to keep remembering that I have to do this in hopes that the cancer will be competly gone! Lately I've been saying to myself "you actually have/had cancer! Have I been in denial that this has happened to me? Life for me has been put on hold and I sure hate it. I feel like I just exist! What a terrible way to live. If I've learned anything with this experience it is to be patient. I just want everything to be back to normal at least my normal crazy life and that is not the case. Even though Radiation will be done in 3 1/2 weeks I still have to go through reconstruction. SIGH>>>SIGH>>>See I'm not patient! I want it all done NOW!

On the positive side I'm getting my energy back and I'm taking kids to school which I have not done in 6 months.. So that is good.

For now I will try my hardest just to be patient.. It is a learned behavior~!